The distinctions in the loving experience are apparent when we look at how we express our love. The emotions are the same, but how we express and the degree in which we express it are different depending on who we love. You may want to spend more time with your friends than your family members. You might enjoy different activities with your co-workers than you do with your spouse.
When and how we express love is determined by preferences. You may prefer to spend more time with someone who is outgoing, rather than quiet, or more serious rather than silly. You may be more physically attracted to someone who is short rather than tall, or older rather than younger. There are an endless number of qualities that we might prefer over others. And those preferred qualities determine whom, when, how, and to what degree we express our love.
Our focus is on romantic relationships, since this seems to be the area of most interest and concern. This is not surprising since these are the people who we are choosing to share most of our lives.
A romantic relationship is one where you have a deep feeling of connection to the other person. You accept them as they are, want them to feel good, and deeply appreciate who they are. They fit in with most of your preferences in a life partner, be it their personality, life goals, beliefs and value systems. One of the ways you desire to express your love for them through your sexuality. Sex is the one key element that distinguishes a romantic relationship from all other types but is definitely not considered the only factor among romantic relationships. However, for many people, romantic relationships mean just one thing, a sexual relationship. When we form romantic relationships, it is important for us to go beyond the physical in understanding and that depends on what level of good human relationship can we develop. Thus, each of us has experienced different levels of relationships.
One of the first things we run into when we talk about romantic relationships is the fact that the word means different things to different people. Our understanding of what close relationships means depends on our experiences and our expectations of relationships. Everyone is looking for a romantic, one-to one relationship. However making such romantic relationships last are difficult because, people have the freedom to choose romantic relationships other than lifelong marriage. Vital communication, acceptance, trust, and ultimately commitment are actual tools and links that keep two persons living within these romantic relationships as they travel together through personal and social change. Romance can grow with these tools if the relationship is giving. Romance however cannot exist in relationships that primarily need, looking to the other for rewards.
It is this freedom to "be ourselves" that makes our relationships romantic. Most of us hide our real selves, or some aspects of our real selves, in various habits or patterns we learned early in our romantic relationships. Sometimes this is conscious, but most often it is the unconscious ways we react to others that block intimacy in our important romantic relationships and prevent us from becoming or staying very close to one another.
A doctor who works with couples who have sexual problems said that romance is "the mutual belief of two people that what is hidden between them hurts their close relationships, and what is revealed between them can only help their relationships." You may have a different definition of romance, but whatever it is, you need to know what romance is really about, otherwise you will fail to understand the basis of romantic relationships.
A romantic relationship is when both partners involved accept each other for the way they are and not the way they want the other person to be. Accepting your partner requires an amount of responsibility from your part in numerous ways. And we must not, under any circumstance, allow ourselves to become a doormat for the other person. We should treat each other with respect, from a deeper level as equal, and learn to listen, enabling the development of a strong foundation, crucial in the building of a solid relationship. We need to understand their soul. However, if we see what exactly attracted us to that person initially, it might be a surprise for us to realize that we always look for what is acceptable on the exterior, disregarding what values exist internally.
There are many principles with regard to relationships and it would be to your benefit if you were to apply some careful thought and consideration to what motivates you to become involved in the relationships you do. A relationship is based on three important facts. You should be associated with the person socially on some common ground and enjoying being with them together. You should also be able to communicate well and express our emotions in a healthy way. And lastly you should be well connected with your soul partner and allow your partner to get to know you better by opening up on a deeper level.
Consider what, in reality, you really want as a human being. After establishing this, in your own right, you will be able to identify these qualities within another person and then you are more likely to be successful in finding the right partner for you.